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Compassion fatigue is the cumulative stress/burnout in the lives of widows who were care givers. While being caregivers to their late husbands they compromised their own well-being.
Burnout or cumulative stress is the state of physical, emotional and mental exhaustion. No wonder we widows seem like the walking dead, and no one truly understands how we feel.
Our experiences/stories are overwhelming, beyond our friends and families scope of comprehension. We need to speak and be listened to, but instead we often hold it all back.
Compassion fatigue has many symptoms:
- Increased negative personality.
- Intrusive images of their late husband’s trauma.
- Lower tolerance/outbursts of anger.
- Viewing the world as less safe.
- Hypervigilance
- Feelings of uselessness/lack of purpose.
- Decreased functioning.
- Loss of hope.
Any of these symptoms could be signaling compassion fatigue, which can lead to post traumatic stress disorder. It is not uncommon to find widows who have learned how to heal from compassion fatigue, counseling those widows who have been exposed to the same burnout.
I urge widows of all backgrounds to develop and maintain good self-care habits. Widowhood is complicated enough without caregiver burnout. The sooner we recognize compassion fatigue the sooner we can put a name to what is holding us back.
Answer the following – Yes or No:
- I have gaps in my memory about their death.
- I avoid certain activities or situations.
- I feel isolated from others.
- I have difficulty falling or staying asleep.
- I feel trapped in a dead end life.
- I don’t feel like I have anyone to talk to.
- I feel on edge and depressed.
- I have no tolerance and get angry easily.
- I feel that I am a “failure” because I couldn’t save them.
- I experience troubling dreams.
- I feel tired or rundown/worthless.
If you answered “Yes” to many of these statements you may need professional help to assist you, to process your grief so that your broken heart can start to heal.
Mary Francis, The Sisterhood of Widows
#thesisterhoodofwidows, #widow, #grief, #griefsupport, #widowsupport, #howtogrieve
