It has been said that half of us feel left out during the holidays.  But for us widows being lonely during the holidays is much more than just “feeling left out”. There is so much hype about having fun and all those get-togethers with friends and family.  Have you ever thought, ‘everyone’s having fun and their life is normal’? When I talk to widows that are lonely during the holidays, they talk about how being creative (singing, painting, cooking, crafts) helped make them feel vital and more engaged.  For some widows the more they connected with their creativity, the more they could connect with others. Be honest with yourself.  If you are missing someone, share your memories of them. Finding tangible ways to honor departed loved ones, helps us to move through our loneliness.  Regardless of how those around you respond, being open with your feelings frees you from hiding behind the “I’m okay” mask. If you are feeling lonely during the holidays, take comfort in a brief act of self-care.  What works for you – being creative, a hot bath, walk in the woods or being around water?  Know what lifts your spirits and what activities you can turn to when you’re feeling lonely. You will experience significantly less loneliness if you try doing small acts of kindness to others.  Even just saying “hello” to a stranger, or holding a door, or giving up your seat can help you feel less lonely during the holidays. Showing others kindness helps us to focus outward.  We need to be that person who becomes part of something bigger than themselves. It only takes a second to make a connection.  Sharing tasks and helping out makes us more comfortable in life.  It helps us to let our guard down so we can be more open to new friendships. Lastly, don’t deny your feelings of loneliness during the holidays   It’s normal to feel lonely when we don’t have our loved ones with us.