It’s hard to tame your holiday stress when you are a grieving widow.  Everyone has extra stress attributed to the holidays and the abundance of rich foods, but grief magnifies our stress even more. https://youtu.be/-ZKPi4ZKHPI So, how do we widows maintain a sense of calm during the holiday season?  Here are a few tips to tame our holiday stress:

• Make your get togethers as a potluck meal.
• Travel on non-peak days.
• Decline some invitations.
• Identify what YOU really want to do.
• Take some time for rest and renewal.
• Do some volunteering.
• Do what goes with your values.
• Shop online or do gift cards if crowds are too hard.
• Meditate on your breathe – inhale deeply.
• Listen to relaxing music.
• Keep things in perspective – things do go wrong.
• Hold onto your sense of humor.

Holidays are stressful, so be aware that people say things stupid things because they just don’t understand or relate to your grief.  Realize that, forgive them, and move forward without holding onto it. Holidays churn up complex feelings and that’s okay.  We widows tend to bury our grief emotions, but if we don’t face them, they will build and add to our holiday anxiety.  Identify the source of your anxiety or stress.  Too many demands and you have no energy (mentally or physically) to do those extra activities.  Or maybe the loneliness is deeper and stronger during the holidays. Don’t beat yourself up if something doesn’t come off just as planned.  Let some things go; example holiday cards or home cooking, and remember that holidays are about being with those that care about us. You may not be the only lonely one out there, so give someone the gift of a thoughtful phone call.  It’s so much more meaningful then a holiday card. Mary Francis, The Sisterhood of Widows #widow, #thesisterhoodofwidows, #widowsupport”, “grief”, “holidaysforwidows”