All Blog Postings by Mary
The Funeral Is Over
Archive notice: This is a historical post from Mary’s years of blogging. Some older posts may mention products, courses or shop items that are no longer available, as Mary now focuses her time and energy on supporting widows inside her private Facebook community. The guidance and stories remain here as a free resource for widows.
For current ways to connect with Mary’s work, you can:
- Read her book on Amazon .
- Request to join her private Facebook group for widows .
Even though the funeral is over and death touches us all, everyone has their own view of death.
Children see death as a loss, while older seniors are tired and may see death as a gain – to be with God and the loved ones who have gone ahead of them. That may be so, but we still have to deal with our emotions and complete the practical tasks of arranging the funeral and filling out the paper work.
Rituals surrounding death (funeral or celebration of life services) bring us comfort and provides a way to express our grief.
Being able to speak freely about funerals and their costs is an important part of emotional health. Reach out to others who have experienced funeral planning and check out prices before you need to.
Once the funeral is over, settling the estate will be your next hurtle. A Will is the most important document as it provides for the distribution of their assets. As a widow you have learned just how important a Will is and hopefully you didn’t have to go through the pain of not having their Will. I understand why most of us are reluctant to write a Will, but it’s a gift to those left behind.
Estates can be complicated and when my Donnie died everyone wanted a copy of both his death certificate and his Will. Thank goodness we had done one when our kids were young, because it made everything so much easier to deal with.
The funeral is over for your husband and now it’s time for you to update your Will. Do it with a lawyer because they will ask you questions about situations you may never have thought about on your own. Questions such as, “What do you want done if one of your children predeceases you?” “Do you want to leave something to the grandchildren or put it in a trust for them?” and “Do you want a living will?”
Whatever your plans, discuss them with your children or other heirs. Don’t limit the discussion to just money. Talk to them about your funeral, family heirloom and what your Will states. Talking about it before your death means there should not be any family issues after your own funeral.