Human emotions are a package deal – the good, the bad and the ugly. Holding in our pain renders us numb to the joy of living as well as blocking our healing. The only way out of grief is to plow directly through its emotional hell. Then we can begin the healing part of our journey. If we support and help each other through this process, our lives become enriched with friendships and grief has less of a hold on us. Unseen fears and loneliness lurk everywhere and it often takes others to guide us (therapist, counselor, friend or family) towards a future where we can start enjoying life again. But even though others want to help, they need to understand that offering help to someone who is grieving could get them a big slap down and that over-empathizing can drag us down and that rushing us may in effect slow the grieving process. So be careful when offering support. Three simple sentences that work best are: “I’m here for you”, “What can I do for you?” and “I love you”. These sentences and your sincere desire to help will be just what a widow needs as she faces the pain of grief. Unfelt pain causes uneasiness and dysfunctional behavior which will become unbearable over time. Let us widows feel our emotions of grief and just be there for us. Knowing that we are loved and cared for is the best medicine there is.