Have you ever stopped and asked yourself, “What are friends for?”  I mean really think about why you have friends.  Are they good friends, occasional friends, fair weather friends or maybe even toxic friends? True friends are the people who are there to throw you a life line when you’re drowning in your grief.  They help buffer you against the stress and loneliness of life as a widow. A woman’s ability to nurture her friendships is one of the reasons why life is easier and she has a longer lifespan than a man.  Friends often do for us what our family can’t.  We can talk to them about the things that are taboo among family members.  They also provide another point of view without judging us. Few people need to be taught how to make friends, but keeping friendships going can be tough.  Yes, you are grieving!  But friendships can’t be put on hold indefinitely without losing them.  Keep in touch, send a note, write a message, go for coffee – just make sure that you let them know that you still value their friendships even if you are not feeling sociable at this time. You will keep the line of communication open by staying sensitive to each other and by acknowledging that you’re temporarily at different times and stages in your life.  Let your friends know you are not going to be available as much but that you will still make time for them. When friends make a mistake or say something they shouldn’t please don’t give up on them.  There’s good in friendships and hopefully things can be turned around.  They just don’t understand our grief and how our broken heart is.  How can they?  We don’t even understand our own emotions. So, my answer to the question “What are friends for?” - is they are something solid to hold onto while everything else is falling apart around you.  You can talk about everything; the old times and the new.  It’s so therapeutic to be with people who know you so well that you don’t have to hide your grief.  It’s a safe place to be and I wouldn’t trade it for anything.